Never Stop Existing
by LiliOfTheValley
Summary: A more appropriate end for a much loved character.


**AN: Just my way of reconciling myself with Sara's death. This is how I'd have liked her last moments to have been like because I think a strong, kick-ass character deserves a kick-ass end.**

She barges into their new accommodations with a not-so-quite fury.

"You made a big mistake, Sara. And now young Mr. Burrows here is going to pay for it."

The woman they know as Susan pulls a gun from the waistband of her pants and trains it on LJ, who doesn't look like he's even breathing as he sits motionless, tied to a chair.

"No, no! Don't!" Sara screams.

She hates the desperation in her voice. It reminds her of all the times in her life when she wasn't in control. Sara looks at LJ, who is so white he might already be dead if not for the tears that have begun to gather in the corners of his eyes. She barely knows this boy, but he is just a boy and she feels the need to protect him.

"How sweet." Susan smirks, but doesn't lower her gun.

"It was my fault, it was me. Kill me." The words flow out of her mouth before she has a chance to think. But once her brain catches up with her heart, Sara finds that as much as she doesn't want to die, she doesn't regret what she's said.

"Please," she whispers. That's as close she'll get to begging. "You need him more than you need me," she reasons, "you kill him and you'll have Lincoln Burrows on your ass faster than you can blink, and you can forget about Michael breaking out of Sona. You think he'll give a damn about a woman he's only known for a few months after you kill his nephew?" As Sara says the words, she knows there is a truth to them, but still Sara hopes that Michael would care. That Michael would come for her.

Again, Susan hesitates. And Sara knows she's won, but her stomach clenches because she knows this victory will end with her death. Susan turns the gun on Sara, but Sara has one last request.

"Susan, please. Don't do this in front of LJ. Please. He doesn't need to see this."

"I'd have to disagree on that one. I think he does need to see exactly what'll happen if he ever tries to do what you did. But I will give you a minute."

Susan goes to leave the room, to give them some semblance of privacy, although the two guards don't make any move to leave the room with her. Sara nods her head in appreciation for the small act of humanity.

"Sara," LJ begins to choke out. The tears are now flowing unrestrained down his face, cutting into the dirt and sweat of Panama. He doesn't want anyone else to die. First his mother, then Veronica, and finally Jane. He's only known Sara for three days, but long before he knew her, he knew what she did for his family.

"Shh, LJ. It's going to be ok," she reassures automatically. Her bedside manner is so ingrained that even in the face of her impending death, Sara can't help but try to offer comfort.

"No, it's not," LJ points out realistically.

"No," she concedes, "maybe not for me. But it will for you. You'll make it out of here and you'll be able to start over and have a real life with your father and your uncle." Sara almost can't finish the sentence because when she conjures up the picture of the three of them, father, son, and brother all together, she can't help but feel a small sting of resentment because she won't be there too. But the resentment doesn't last long. She doesn't have long.

"LJ, promise me something. Promise me you'll tell Michael that this wasn't his fault. "He'll--." She pauses. It's almost too painful to think of Michael. "He'll think it was, but make sure he knows. Please."

Sara starts to get desperate as she feels the last seconds of her life tick away. She doesn't have the luxury of forming eloquent sentences anymore, and the words begin to flow out as quickly as LJ's tears. She wishes she could take him into her arms and provide him with the maternal comfort that was taken away from him time and time again, but her hands are tied securely behind her back.

"LJ, this isn't your fault either, you know that, right? And I don't-- I don't, God, I don't want to die. There's so much I never-- Tell Michael I love him, please? Tell him--

Susan enters the room again, and for the first time, Sara shows the panic she's been feeling ever since she found her father's body strung up haphazardly by one of his dress ties.

"Wait, wait. Please. One last thing, please. LJ, don't let them forget me. I-- I don't want to be forgotten. I don't want to stop existing."

LJ can see the terror in her eyes and hear the sob build up in her throat. But then she is calm. Or maybe she just seems calm compared to the utter panic enveloping him as he watches Susan once again pull out her gun.

"LJ, turn away," Sara demands in a strong and level voice.

"No."

"LJ, you've seen so much. Too much. You don't need to see this too. Please."

Susan raises the gun to Sara and LJ can't turn away, no matter how much he wants to honor her last request. He expects Sara to close her eyes. He would've closed his eyes rather than stare his death in the face. But Sara doesn't, she just looks at him. Not at Susan, not at the gun, but at him. He knows that it's not him that she wants with her in her last seconds, and he can't give her what she really wants, his uncle. But he knows that he needs to give her the only comfort he can before she is taken from this world. Before she takes his place and the bullet meant for him.

"I'll never forget you, Sara."

And then she was gone.


End file.
